Reasons to be cheerful

The one who got away came back My daughter Cornwall My sister My nonbiological sisters Tequila Dancing My home

We'll always have Paris......

Looking forward to celebrating my birthday in Paris with some of my best friends! Antique market in the morning followed by lunch on the left bank. Am hoping to find the elusive art deco clock which will make my life complete....until I want the next thing.

Things can only get worse

I think it has been over a year since I blogged. Am going to try to devote more time and energy to my writing in the next few months, and this seems as good a place to start as anywhere. It was intended to be a way of expressing my feelings about my MS and its progress (wrong word because it has connotations of things getting better, and MS can only get worse). My hairy neurologist tells me I am officially in remission. Of course that should make me happy, but there is always the ying and yang of MS - remission and RELAPSE. So being the glass half empty kind of girl that I am, the word remission only reminds me that I have a degenerative illness and that slowly but surely my body is attacking itself. Typical bloody competitive me, can't even let some virus or bacteria get the better of me, it has to be my own body!
Apart from the mental stuff, I feel a bit of a fraud when I go to the MS clinic. Crutches and wheelchairs are a very visual indicator of the disease, but the exhaustion aspect, which along with my vision problems is my main symptom, gets little sympathy. The only way I can describe it is that you simply feel like if you have to move an arm, your head, or your little toe, the effort it will take will kill you on the spot. You literally feel like life is draining out of you body through your legs. The memory of this haunts my remission and the ghost of MS past and MS future is always present.

Signing off for now

Was tempted to call this entry 'Blog Off' but it doesn't seem quite right as I am the one withdrawing temporarily. I am facing some medical stuff next week which I am finding hard to cope with, as well as lots of mental stuff which is even harder. When there are people suffering real disaster in this world, I am going to withdraw for a little while and just get on with my life, rather than trying to make sense of it through writing, because there is no sense to any of it anyway.

Cursed

Another friend at work hit with a cancer scare. Thinking of her xxx

Tabi

I don't know if you are reading this, but please know I love you.

Barcelona.......

Just booked our salsa trip for April! Very excited, a group of 7 of us going to dance the nights away at Mojitos. Seville in 5 weeks too, Cornwall in the summer (and I even found a salsa bar in Gwithian last year!).